:: The Chronicles of ß ë ë ::

h'ok. its been a month now that i've been MIA and not loggin in AND i realise that my tag board needs sum kinda log-in shit thingy?? wot the hell!! its only been a month *geeeeeez* nways, i have the mood to blog tonite!! yay!! >.< also, before i start my much boring ramblings, there is this song that i like to share with my peeps out there. yeah, i cant quite read chinese tho, BUT the song's lyrics conveys so much. its darn meaningful!! well, at least it is to me, and obviously i had to find out wot it meant b4 i posted it up *hehe*

你很愛他 by F.I.R
當你決定　你要離開我　我沒有說什麼　就當作你自由
有好幾次我都想挽留　苦求也沒有用　就當作是寂寞

只有我能明白　他的溫柔　對你是種解脫
只需要告訴我　誰是你的最愛

其實你很愛他　對我的懲罰　說你沒有想他　是可憐我吧
我已沒有藉口　只能放手　不敢奢求　你說愛我

其實你很愛他　他很溫柔嗎　其實你很想他　就說出口吧
我已不想多說　摀住耳朵　不想再次聽到你說　你很愛他
就坦白告訴我　誰是你的最愛

其實你很愛他　對我的懲罰　說你沒有想他　是可憐我吧
我已沒有藉口　只能放手　不敢奢求　你說愛我

其實你很愛他　他很溫柔嗎　其實你很想他　就說出口吧
我已不想多說　摀住耳朵　不想再次聽到你說　你很愛他　你很愛他..."

oritey~ can i get the SPOTLIGHT on me now? yeah? >.< LOL!!

well, i've been an official BUMMER ^(OO)^ beginning of last week. thats y i headed down to Lion Land with mummy. it all happened so last minute and coincidentally, cos she asked me few days after i quit that do i wanna go with her? and i was like..YEAH, y not? im FREE!! *hoho* and shopping would do me some good? *hahaha* yeah, all that blooody shopping was super good. but hey! im an official JOBLESS BUMMER with no blooody income at all. DAMNIT!! i need to start lookin for a new job now *gosh* i have to pull myself together!! and it betta be quick cos i think i've been livin on bread and water when i got back to KL *hahahaha* oh boooy~ atm, i so wish i printed money.

i'd say, my life has been quite orite ever since i quit my job. still alive and kickin well, js that no in-flow but FAR MORE freaking out-flow? *hehe* i've got ppl asking me everytime they see me:

arent u bored?
wot do u do at home?
arent u sick of staying home?
have u found a job yet?
r u gonna look for a job? or R U EVER GONNA LOOK?? *haha*
have u sent out CV's and resumes?
how long u wanna be like this? . . . so on & so forth, i guess u know the REST!

all i replied was : *hehehe* i am i am!! >.< lookin lookin... later?

*gosh* gimme a break. i will look. i totally cant live without cash inflow ritE?!?!?! i mean, whos gonna support my life? my shopping? my food?? my nites out?? my stuff? and d list goes on and on~ *hehe*

quite a stoned conversation i had with my mum the other day:

B: my phone is abit cacat-ed(suck) rite now. hmmmm, cos i dropped it few times.

M: oh? get it repaired then.

B: repair costs. mite as well get a new one rite. i wanna change phone~

M: oh? y r u telling me?

B: . . . . . (grins n thinking to myself~ can u kinda sponsor?? but, oh well, her respond already carries an indirect answer)

oh dear. i do want unlimited things. my list js gets longer and longer everyday. DARN!! i guess, thats like prolly, one of my least concern. i reckon im more worried about sumtin else. sumtin thats been goin on in my head for weeks now. its impossible for me to disclose this info rite now cos, i, myself do not know wot im thinking.

i mite or mite not be the problem to the question. i DO NOT know!! seriously, i js need to figure out. but all i know is, i MAKe the CALL! *hehe* >.< and i guess, i need more time to consider about the 'stuff' thats been goin on lately.

a fwen i chat to js then, whom i'd like to refer as the 'JELLY MAN' told me that if i hesitated b4 makin any decisions in my life, it most likely mean that i dun wan it to happen or i wasnt too sure that i wanted it. well, he does have a point tho. but later on as we talked, he finally concluded that 'gals jus think too much and complicates things' and im like~~ hmmmmmm~ O.o really? really?? is that tru now? me? think too much? *haha*

i reckon im too darn free *hahahaha* hence, im bewildered by random trivial thoughts thats been floating in my mind.

oh boy~ but some things need to be resolved. it cant be left there untouched. i guess i have to break my head soon! =o)