*gosh*
i felt dumb again today. well, obviously, i did sumtin wrong. AIYA!! y am i so blur?? i wonder to myself again today, whether AUDIT is really for me? yeah~ i wonder... la la la~ im the kind that needs excitement. not just sit down and so the same thing. then again, i just started. i shoudlnt be complaining. hmmm~ *sigh* but but, i cant help it. i dunno why. every morning i wake up, till i go to my client's place.... geeeeeeeeeeeez~ woteva!
maybe i am L.O.S.T atm. i just need to find sumtin that im really interested. sumtin that will really really catch my attention. sumtin that i would put my whole self in. yes yes~
tonite is the night where i suddenly felt lonely. weird tho. i was headin back to office just then and WOW~ the big bright round moon shined down on me. it has been ages since i saw such a beautiful moon shining down from the dark dark sky. i think the last time was back in Sydney?? >.< it felt nice when i saw it the last time. but not tonite. it was a different kinda feeling. my fwen told me about the moon too~ hmmmm~ the mooooooooon~ big round mooon~ i WISH i was strolling on the beach~ how romantic would that be?? with my barefeet running around the fine sand *awwwwwwwwww*
i think i felt depressed? well, maybe not that sad but...more like..... dishearten? dispirited?? *hehe* is there such word? i dunno. i just felt.... *SIGH*SIGH* +.O ok~ now i think i feel depressed.
sumtimes, i feel anxious. maybe its because of my job. i reckon so. partly cos of that. and im stil havin nitemares. not ghostly kinda dreams but more like terrifying kinda dreams. its either im being chased, or my fwens are being chased, OR someone is runnin away from someone OR some kinda scene where it just frightens me.
i need peace? ^o^V
oh i think i need shopping. everywhere is on sale atm. and even tho im based at the mall rite now, i dun even have time to shop. yikes! wot happen to my xmas shopping?? YUP! i wanna go xmas shopping~ i dun think one weekend was enuff for me. then again, im a gal. typical typical. i have nothing in mind. i have nothing to buy. i just walk walk walk~ then i got *AHA* nice~??? hmmmm??? not bad ....looks nice on moi? *hehe* ok! set! BUY BUY!! *muahahaha*
i think my fwen nearly died of tiredness when he went shopping wit me last weekend *gosh* hope i didnt torture him. LOL!!! O.o hmmm~ guys usually have sumtin in mind, hence they go shopping. but but, gals? *AHAHHA* fat chance theres a motive!
then again, i dun think im really that craaazy into shopping. prolly cos i have nothing else betta to do tho. hmmm~ sumtimes, i ask myself, do i really know myself?
i think outsiders think that im always happy. the happy-go-lucky gal. no worries mate. hmmmmmmm, i think im more to keeping to myself really. no one knows exactly when im sad, when i cry, when i really do think about my life. uh-huh....yea yea..i dun talk much about me huh?? yeah~ i know~ not sure bout me? *hehe* duno wot i wan? or am i just waiting? but waiting for wot?
i mite fall one day and i wish there will be someone to lemme fall on. someone to hold me??? forever.......*ahhhhhhhhhhhhh* im dreaming~ im always in fairytales..... stories, fantasies...that will neva happen to me. those are my wishes. my wish of never ending story, together forever, stayin the same....ever the same O.o
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